A Kiss in Dreams for Victoria by Rebecca Lu Kiernan   I watch you sleep for the last time.You were to be my stepdaughter, laughing angel, fragile pixie. I have been  planning my getaway for months, feeding and dressing You, trying to detach myself. Forgive me someday for Not warning you, helping you let me go. I fear you will Forget me in your slight six years. Your father will surely Never tell you how I cherished bathing you, the way you Relaxed your head in my hands when we dipped back in  The tub to rinse your hair. Thank you for painting my red Car in the cobblestone driveway of your seafoam green House, for curling in my lap when I read to you, for every magical time you rested your head on my shoulder and Smiled up at me, or put your tiny hand in mine, or brought Me the brush and barrettes for your gold-brown hair. I kiss Your forehead mostly for myself, guessing this kiss in Dreams may translate to a peck on the head by a giraffe. When I think I have successfully forgotten you, there you Will be in the smell of honeysuckle at a coral cove, in the Gossamer pink wings of a dragonfly, in the warm sand Becoming a crocodile in my cupped hands, in the silver Starlings dancing in the lilac after rain. And for the record, I would have been a terrible stepmother For I could have never brought myself to prepare you for Becoming a woman. I could have never told your wide gray Eyes, under every tiger lily there is a scorpion, beneath every Kiss, a welcome razor for the wrist. ©2001 by Rebecca Lu Kiernan Rebecca Lu Kiernan is the editor of the print journal, Gecko. She has published in Ms. Magazine and has work upcoming in Asimov's Science Fiction. Her collection of poetry, Sex With Trees And Other Things Equally Responsive was recently published by 2River Press. She coaches gifted writers and does literary criticism for the general public. Contact her for dates and fees.

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